Today in "world's best headlines"... Stray goat goes wild at Carrickfergus shop. No, seriously. It opens:
A goat has head-butted a pensioner and jumped on cars after being refused entry to a County Antrim shop.
I'm also a fan of this part:
The manager said his employee replied: "Yeah, right." But when she spotted the goat she dove in to the customer's car for cover.
It's like Goat Simulator in real life.
See, not all news has to be about depressing things! Sometimes, it's about an irate goat and his frustration when he's denied his right to buy an early morning loaf of bread.